Do Your Influences Support Your Sobriety

Do Your Influences Support Your Sobriety

Published July 2014

How we feel, and the circumstances of our lives can depend significantly on who we choose to surround ourselves with. The crucial question is asking yourself whether or not the people in your life (right now) are lifting you and inspiring you, or are they dragging you down, complicating your life, and putting you in dangerous or uncomfortable situations?

Please take a moment and reflect on recent events with a friend or family member and find out whether or not they are lifting you or bringing you down. Ask yourself the following questions to help clarify whether these influences are in your best interest or the worst for your well-being.

1. Do you feel inspired by new thoughts and ideas after spending time with this person, or do you feel drained just from being around them?
2. Do they listen to you as you speak or interrupt you without hearing what you have to say?
3. Do you trust this person, or do you feel uneasy about opening up to them because you fear they may use what you say against you to benefit themselves in one way or another?
4. Do they compliment you on simple things and make you feel worthy, or do they belittle you making you feel like you’re not good enough, smart enough, or good-looking enough?
5. Do you feel safe around this person, or do they put you in uncomfortable and dangerous situations?
6. Have you wondered why you continue to involve this person in your life because they don’t bring you much joy or offer any kind of fun, excitement, or wisdom…?
7. Do you feel manipulated or disrespected by this person or this group of people?

After answering these questions and keeping a specific person or group in mind, it should be clear to you who is lifting you and dragging you down. The truth is that we all have someone in our lives that drag us down. The best way to make life more enjoyable, peaceful, and less problematic is by distancing yourself from these people and the situations they create.